Sunday, August 27, 2006

my shaved pussy...

yah, that post-title ought to get me a lot of hits...

earlier this summer, i decided to shave my pussy...
i had seen other shaved pussies and thought "wow, they look like *really happy* shaved pussies". my excitement grew when doing some online research and discovered that almost all shaved pussies are happier and healthier and, in addition, much more soft to the touch. there are a lot of sites that advocate shaving pussies; sometimes they recommend you shave your pussy all year round! but, since this was my first time, i thought i would experiment just for the summer months. Also, given the fact that it gets so damn hot and my pussy tends to mat up and start molting when the weather changes, the opportunity to shave my pussy this summer was really a no-brainer. while on the topic of molting, do i *really* need to mention the clump-shedding of an unshaven pussy? every time i turn around i would find a several clumps and balls of hair from my molting pussy. moreso in the spring, but all year-round, nonetheless! since shaving my pussy i have received many compliments: "omg! that looks so great!"; "wow, your pussy sure is happy!"; "i've never seen your pussy so friendly!". i just giggle and tell them that it was probably THE BEST decision i ever made regarding my pussy. my pussy is softer, happier and no longer leaving large chunks of dark hair over my off-white carpet! i'm not certain i'll continue to shave my pussy over the winter; i live in canada, after all. however, my pussy is an *indoor* pussy, so we'll see what happens. maybe i'll experiement and shave my pussy again in the fall before the winter sets in so my pussy can get a nice fuzzy undercoat going before the snow begins to fly.

here is a picture of my shaved pussy...

It's a hobby... Part V

a **very** tiny wild flower on the alberta prairies

Saturday, August 26, 2006

Thanks Logo!

Here they are, far more than anyone wanted to know, the answers to 63 questions no one asked me...

1. How old do you wish you were?
I am exactly the right age at this moment.
2. Where were you when 9/11 happened?
On my way to work. When I got there, I had a message waiting from my roommate. She was crying and I couldn't make out what she was saying. I called her back and found out what happened and went upstairs to the marketing department in time to see plane two crash into the second tower. Very surreal.
3. What do you do when vending machines steal your money?
Curse the gods that are telling me that I don't need that kitkat bar! JERKS!!
4. Do you consider yourself kind?
No, I'm a nasty ole bitch. Any questions?
5. If you had to get a tattoo, where and what would it be?
Hmmm. I have one. So where that one sits right now, I guess. You really can't mulligan a tattoo.
6. If you could be fluent in any other language, what would it be?
Stupid. Just so I can understand the world around me.
7. Do you know your neighbors?
We greet each other with "Hello" and an occasional "Fuck you".
8. What do you consider a vacation?
A trip to the mailbox.
9. Do you follow your horoscope?
Uhhhm, no.
10. Would you move for the person you loved?
11. Are you touchy feely?
12. Do you believe that opposites attract?
Attract? Ayup. Last? Newp.
13. Dream job?
Internet shopper!
14. Favorite channels?
Discovery, A&E and Bravo.
15. Favorite place to go on a weekend?
Staying home in my jammers and not worrying about anything!
16. Showers or bath?
Showers for a daily thing. Baths for when I'm cold or when I'm sickies. With lots of bubbles, in the pitch dark and some Beethoven.
17. Do you paint your nails?
Ayup. Fingers and toes. Usually black or a very dark vampyre/blood red or purple.
18. Do you trust people easily?
Newp. Not at all.
19. What are your phobias?
Nothing impairs me from doing something or trying something. I even stepped on the glass floor at the CN Tower in order to overcome a fear of heights!!! Yay me!
20. Do you want kids?
On the side with some BBQ sauce, please.
21. Do you keep a handwritten journal?
22. Where would you rather be right now?
23. What makes you feel warm and safe?
Hot Chocolate and Seatbelts.
24. Heavy or light sleep?
25. Are you paranoid?
Who told you that???
26. Are you impatient?
It's really a situational call.
27. Who can you relate to?
Stupid question.
28. How do you feel about interracial couples?
Ok, I was wrong... THIS is a Stupid Question (tm).
29. Have you been burned by love?
3rd and 4th degree burns.
30. What's your life motto?
People suck (tm).
31. What's your main ringtone on your mobile?
Metallica - One
32. What were you doing at midnight last night?
Watching "Goodfellas"
33. Who was your last text message from?
34. Whose bed did you sleep in last night?
Ehm... mine.
35. What color shirt are you wearing?
Blue tank shirt.
36. Most recent movie you watched?
"Talladega Nights - The Ballad of Ricky Bobby"
37. Name five things you have on you at all times?
License, Debit card, House Keys, Mobile, Earrings.
38. What color are your bed sheets?
39. How much cash do you have on you right now?
40. What is your favorite part of the chicken?
41. What is your favorite town/city?
San Francisco. But I have a feeling, when I get overseas, that will change. Quickly. But I DO love SFO!
42. I can't wait till...
I go to Yurp!
43. Who got you to join Blogger?
44. What did you have for dinner last night?
Homemade Berry Smoothie.
45. How tall are you barefoot?
46. Have you ever smoked crack?
47. Do you own a gun?
I have a pit-bull. Nuff said.
48. What do you prefer to drink in the morning?
49. What is your secret weapon to lure in the opposite sex?
Boobs? I dunno. I don't lure. I couldn't flirt if I tried. It's all V, yo. Yes, they're real and they're spectacular!
50. Do you have A.D.D?
Do you mean Attention Deficit Dis... OH COOL!! Glittery things!!
51. What time did you wake up today?
52. Current worry?
How DO they get the soft flowing caramel inside the Caramilk(tm) Bar.!
53. Current hate?
54. Favorite place to be?
The lake where I grew up.
55. Where would you like to travel?
56. Where do you think you'll be in 10 years?
57. Last thing you ate?
Popcorn @ movie threatre.
58. What songs do you sing in the shower?
U2 & Joseph & The Technicolour Dreamcoat songs.
59. Last person that made you laugh?
Will Ferrell
60. Worst injury you ever had?
Completely fractured humorous.
61. Does someone have a crush on you?
62. What is your favorite candy?
Peanut Butter M&Ms, Sour Patch Kids, Strawberry Licorice
63. Favorite errogenous zone?
All of the above... or wait... all of the BELOW!!

Friday, August 25, 2006

not sure what this means... rofl...

I Am

Which tarot card are you?

Destiny, fortune, luck, success.
The 4 elements.
Unexpected turn of luck.
In the midst of sky and clouds is the disk of Tarot with the letters of the Divine Name placed between.
At the corners are the four guardians of the earth: the eagle, the man, the bull and the lion.
The disk is in movement signifying constant change and transformation.
The sphinx atop the wheel holds the sword of discernment and represents balance in the midst of unending fluidity.

Thursday, August 24, 2006

Apparently, life is NOT a game of MONOPOLY...

There are many reasons why I commute to work via public transit. It is cleaner for the environment; I never have to worry about fighting with traffic; I can listen to music and read at the same time; I can catch cat naps to and from the office; the price of gasoline is *never* going down (currently hitting around $1.10-$1.15/litre) so I only ever have to put fuel in my truck once a month; the wear and tear on my vehicle is never an worry for me; I can catch cat naps to and from the office (Yah, I know, I said that twice, but it *really* is a great great great bonus!!).
Of course there are drawbacks to public transportation. Some people genuinely smell *bad* and said people don't realize they smell *bad*; there are annoying, fidgety, bouncy, sniffly, coughy, itchy, chewy kinds of people and said people are infinite in quirks and numbers; sometimes the bus drivers are dangerous individuals that think they're driving an RX7 and not a giant bacteria tube; ehm, bacteria; no A/C; no proper heat; "colourful caricatures"; traffic jams while caught in any of the above scenarios.
However, if I am generally speaking, it is WAY more relaxing than having to worry about any of the above concerns. And so today, I am given one more reason why it is better to take public transit than it is to drive my own vehicle into the downtown core.
Calgary has just been ranked with the 4th highest average Downtown Monthly Parking Rate in the world.
International monthly rates:

1. London -- West End, $1,002.15.

2. Tokyo, $783.42.

3. New York -- Midtown, $641.65.

4. Calgary, $375

5. Paris, $354.35.

6. Los Angeles, $212.05.

7. Houston, $166.29

...and unfortunately for those that choose to drive on their commute to downtown you can't roll the dice and land on FREE PARKING, just pass go and pay $375.

Monday, August 21, 2006


triple swiped! (from kel & ann)

1. Grab the nearest book.
2. Open the book to page 123.
3. Find the fifth sentence.
4. Post the text of the next 3 sentences on your LJ along with these instructions.
5. Don't you dare dig for that "cool" or "intellectual" book in your closet! I know you were thinking about it! Just pick up whatever is closest.
6. Tag five people.

NEAREST BOOK TO HAND: "Mort" by Terry Pratchett

"Oh." Flick, flick. The carp were watching her disdainfully.
"And my legs?" he said.
"Yes. Sorry."

Tuesday, August 15, 2006

Duuuuude... Like, totallyyyyy!!

I saw one the coolest things on the way to work this morning. Random guy was dressed-up in a navy blue pin-striped suit with a light blue shirt and mid-tone blue tie. He was carrying a black attache and wearing dark RayBan sunglasses. He looked very suave and very professional. A very typical corporate junkie. But what made this one of the coolest things is that this random guy was riding a skateboard.

Sunday, August 13, 2006

i hope that's a milkshake in there...

so my mates and i stopped @ the World Famous (tm) drive-in called Peter's the other day.
if you're EVER in calgary and want to have THE BEST burger, onion rings and milkshake you have to go to 16th avenue (aka The Trans Canada Highway) and stop here for some delicious eats. ok, i'm done plugging the drive-in and my ateries...

so we sit down with our food and next to us are three well-dressed l(a)ds having a nice little lunch under the overcast sky.
LDS Missionary Boys
(i took this picture quite anonymously hence the reason why i halo'ed out their faces -i thought that was a nice touch- one of the little blokes kept staring over at me -i think it was the disconcerting colour of my hair- so i had to be a bit stealthy about the whole thing)

i have always been a bit curious as to the nature of such people, to be quite honest. i have more than a healthy dose of spiritual curiosity. i have done some serious soul-searching to come up my own conclusions, which are pretty much undefinable by any religious sect, but it always fascinates me when i come across people who are on their own "mission from god". now, i'll never be converted, i just dont work that way, but it has been attempted! kudos to those who have tried. i have always thought that spirituality, religious choices and such were also tremendously personal. then again, i am a tremendously personal person. to have this desire to share your god with someone else, go out, convert, earn free toasters or frequent god miles REALLY astounds me. with that said, this is coming from a person who believes in a general purposeless to the existence of life.
i kept thinking: these little mormon boys are far away from their families, they have pretty strict rules to adhere to and their mission (as they have chosen to accept it) is to win souls for god. do they *really* understand the implications of that? the seriousness of that task? do they understand that there is a whole entire schmozzle of crap happening behind the scenes of this whole God Industry (tm)? and i realize it isn't just lds. they've just become the outlet of this post. but its everywhere. what comes with good intentions is usually built on the foundation of horrible deeds. every religious sect has done it and will continue to ad infinitum... anyway, i hope so. i hope they *really* understand.
then the other part of me giggles when i think of these little mormon boys... oh, yes, i know what you get up to! i know, from first-hand experience, exactly what it is that you get up to... and good for you!!! ;) i won't tell, i promise... your secret is safe with me... well, you me and the big g...

Wednesday, August 09, 2006

now... tell me what you really think...

we all make terrible freudian slips now and again..

[when refering to an eliminated rocker on the television program rockstar...]

me: he has that sort of Blames Cunt sound to him... ermmm... did i just say Blames Cunt?

friend: that is blog-worthy

Hippo Burfday to Ann!

A Very Merry Real-Birthday to Ann!!
To Ann!
A Very Merry Real-Birthday to Ann!!
Hope you're having an Awesomely Specially Day!!

Thursday, August 03, 2006


I'm feeling a bit of cabin fever as of late. I have been going out and doing stuff with friends and sort of keeping busy... not sitting at home and wasting away my life on the computer *cough* *nervous laugh* *cough*... I have gone to visit ma girl Cheryl in Toronto in May... unfortunately that visit was much much much too short. I went camping in June and toured around the mountains a bitsy. I am going to visit the girls in Edmonton mid-August... I haven't been bored, that's for sure!! So what is it???
I guess maybe it isn't cabin fever that I am experiencing. I think it's more along the lines of "Continent Fever". I think that am well-traveled in my own country. Although I have not been to the Maritimes, I know I will make it there eventually and I have not driven cross-country but I am confident that I will experience that one day too. I have been throughout the Pacific Northwestern USA and into Southern California as well (btw, drive the PCH!! - it's something that just must be done!). I've driven through Nevada and Idaho and Montana. I have no desire to visit the Mexican Riviera or any other part of touristy-Mexico for that matter, but I have dipped my toes across the border and had a bit of a visit there too.
It is with shame, I confess this to you all: I have never experienced a trip across the pond.
And believe me it isn't for lack of desire!! I want NOTHING MORE than to go to Europe! Here! Take my money! Don't ask me the reasons why I haven't gone yet. I really *DON'T*KNOW*. I research accommodations, flights, destinations... I plan dates and events... There is so much that I want to see and I guess my reasoning has been there is also so much that I need to do before I go see it. At least, that's my excuse. "Europe will always be there... this year the fence needs to be built!" or "Nah, the basement needs to be developed" UGH! I hate being a Responsible Adult(tm). Something always needs to be taken care of before I go out and have fun. And although I've rearranged my thinking so much over the last few years to finally accept that I'm in a GREAT place in my life and I have wonderful opportunities and the resources to take those opportunities, I have to admit, the worse part about it is the *actual* rewiring. We spend so much time fighting our inner desires for the sake of something else. When we're kids we just want to be away from wherever it is that we grew up. When we were students in university living off soda crackers and tuna fish (truth) we couldn't wait to be adults and have enough money to be able to pay our rent AND buy food that month. As young adults we couldn't wait until we were settled and established to start enjoying life. Now, when we begin enjoying life we can't help but feel that we should be bettering our situations or saving for retirement or something equally dull. I promised myself a few years ago that I would stop trying to think my way out of situations. That I would be more carefree with the things that I want and desire and follow through with them to see where they might lead me. For the most part, I do a pretty damn good job being who I am without a lot of restrictions. The other part is in fear of jeopardizing the stability that has afforded me to be a little more free-spirited and carefree. I guess it is the Catch 22 of actually being in the place that you've worked so hard to be.
Ok, so here's what I'm thinking. I have no more excuses. I have no reason not to go. And if I have not stepped off of this continent by this time next year (W.O.A. time, btw) then I will forfeit any right I ever had to be a human being.