Tuesday, October 05, 2010


I've let my life spiral. Winding down and down and down. I've dug a hole a foot wide and a mile deep and I'm staring up at nothing but a pinhole. It's time I climb out.

Thinking "positively" seems so foreign to me now. Not that I was ever really the cheer-leading type. But I am human and my candy-coated exterior is not candy. It is a hardened shell of cynicism and I am smothered with it. Reality abides.

I know am allowed to exist as I have made myself but I also have tasted the poisoned kool-aid of my negative thoughts. I am not blinded to the harshness of "it all" so when beauty emerges it is bright and beautiful and impossible to miss. I am just hoping that injecting more positive thoughts into my mind I will be able to lift the veil that has muted these bright and beautiful moments.