why do they call it a crush? because it hurts so damn much...

hi name was J.J. he was two years older than i and in a few days his family would be moving away and i would never see him again. he was charming and nice and had manners and all the "good things" you're NOT supposed to have as a teenager. helen of troy had NOTHING on his smile. he had confidence without arrogance. and he made my 12 year old vat of hormones stir to life whenever i saw him. junior high school would have to start without the hopes of seeing him in the hallway and life would *never* be the same. i had to tell him. i had to tell the only man in the world that i would ever love how i felt about him.
quick! he was getting away! running across the the front lawn of the church, in my sunday best, i knew exactly what i was going to say and i knew exactly how he was going to react! he would sweep me off my chubby little feet and swing me around, plant a romantic kiss on my bonne belle'd strawberry lip-smackered lips and we would live happily every after. "no, mum!" he would say quite firmly, "i am not moving with you, i am staying here with my one true love! yes, i know we are only 12 and 14 years old, but i love her. i have always loved her!" and we would pedal off into the sunset. oh, this was going to work. i know it would.

me: "hi jj..." -inner dialogue- *MIND GONE BLANK*
him: "hey."
me: "so..." -inner dialogue- *BLANK BLANK!! CHRIST!! I'M AT A CHURCH!! WHERE THE HELL IS GOD WHEN YOU NEED HIM!??*
him: "yah?"
me: "so... did you know you look like simon le bon?" -inner dialogue- *YOU are SUCH a MORON!!!*
him: "no, but thanks."

and then... he vanished.
so NOT The Plan(tm)!!!

(and yes, he DID look like simon le bon!! rawwwrrr!!)